I got to your first paragraph and as someone who played XI for a long time, you're fundamentally incorrect that bonds formed for efficiency. A lot of people were content to fail with their friends instead of leapfrogging from group to group looking for randoms to clear with. Your reputation would get annihilated that way and the XI community had pleeeeenty of unofficial boards where it was safe to call out people being shitty people. I can think of four off the top of my head, and that's not counting the ones I didn't know about.
I will now read the rest of your post. You're down one early, though.
I will now read the rest of your post. You're down one early, though.