It was as if the clouds were waiting with bated breath for the sun to make its exit. As soon as the last vestige of the warm orange glow sank into the depths of the ocean, the lanky palm trees began to bend to the increasing strength of the winds, its leaves rustling loudly in protest. The darkness came quickly, and rain followed soon after. Khadai went to attend to the fish that were affixed to the rack, just before the storm began in earnest. The rest of the group had left before nightfall, but Roen remained seated by the fire that still flickered, sheltered from the weather by the trees and the crag that arched above.
"Figure's such a lovely place would get marred by horrendous weather."
Roen recognized Gharen’s voice without turning. She had heard his approach, limping gait shuffling over sand along with the light tapping of a cane that searched for solid footing. “No place is safe from the storm, I have learned.†She regarded him briefly. “You should sit.â€
"Mayhaps, but tis jus' wind an' rain." He shrugged, but acquieced none the less, lowering himself slowly to the ground with some difficulty. "Miss Jakkya suggested we be locked in a room. I'm inclined te agree."
Roen snorted softly. "Kiht can be impatient at times. I think a part of her fears that I will disappear again."
"Ye cannae have disappeared fer too terribly long, ye helped them find me,†Gharen reflected quietly.
Goosebumps rose along her arms and it was not from the cold. Roen stared straight ahead into the darkness and said nothing as the howling winds suddenly filled the silence between them. "Has no memory of the time that has passed returned to you?" she finally broke the quiet again, her voice raspy.
"No, th' last I remember t'was th' bridge in th' shroud.†Gharen shook his head, his untrimmed hair falling heavily in front of his eyes. “Pretty sure'n tha' I was attacked. Tis... fuzzy at best."
Roen only afforded him a sidelong glance, taking care to keep her tone and expression neutral. "Has Delial still told you nothing?"
He looked back at her curiously. "Only tha' Nero has been put te grass, an' ye've had somethin' o' a hard time o' it."
The paladin flexed her jaw and averted her gaze at the name, looking back out to the ocean. She was not yet ready to have that conversation yet.
"Though I have th' distinct feelin' they're nae tellin me everythin',†Gharen continued to muse quietly. “Which is gettin tirin' in it's own way... bein' treated as if I may break upon th' slightest provocation."
"You cannot blame them." Roen shrugged. When she turned to look at him, her voice had taken a cooler turn. "Who is to say they are wrong?"
"I recall believin' tha' ye dispised me an dinnae want anythin' te do with me because I dinnae support ye in followin' Nero." He too turned, meeting her gaze dead on. "Given th' way our previous meetin' an' this one are goin', was I right?"
Roen gave him a hard stare. A frown creased her brow despite her best efforts. "Think you so little of me?" The rain pelted the canvas of leaves above and the flames in front of them danced chaotically.
"Dinnae know what te think right now,†Gharen barked back. “Because people feel th' need te nae talk te me about it. Given I don' have any recollection regardin' th' past cycle. Tis a bit o' a gap an' alot o' ground te cover. Only learned th' past couple o' suns ago tha' Ishgard has thrown open th' gates te their city." He shook his head as he looked away. "Somethin' I imagine tis old news an' would garner looks like I was a foreigner or a loon fer nae knowin'."
Breath… the paladin told herself. Why were they rushing into this discussion already? Was this not what she had feared? And yet… she knew the truth would and should come forth eventually. Her brother was almost chomping at the bits to hear it. After one long exhale, the frown that had twisted her visage slowly faded again.
"I understand your impatience,†she murmured. “It is as if you slept a long time. And while you slept, the world continued on." She turned back to the ocean and the waves that were violently crashing against the beach. “Give it time, Gharen. Not all of us are ready or wanting to relive those moons again."
That did not quell his ire. Gharen planted his cane into the sand as he rose again hastily, his hand nearly shaking with the effort. "Don' forget th' part about while I slept, some thrice damned infernal dark side ran about causin' trouble an' gods know what else,†he snapped back.
Roen shot him a narrowed look. "Indeed. That did happen. I would tell you what you want to know, only..." She exhaled sharply through her nose. "I know not the details. Delial, Kiht, and Kage... they were the ones that were following your trail."
Gharen paused, looking at her expectantly. “"An ye were lookin' inte other leads or th' like?"
The paladin’s gaze did not waver, although her entire form stiffened. Her fingers curled slightly upon the sand. "Nay." She shook her head slowly. "I only bid them to find you."
Gharen furrowed his brow, confusion clear in his eyes. "While ye were doin' what?"
Roen set her jaw, steeling herself. "As I tried to forget that the rest of the world existed."
A long pause fell between the siblings again. Her brother seemed frozen in time for a moment as he made no sound or movement. Then he swallowed as her words seemed to sink in, and looked away from her.
"So what yer meanin' te say... is ye were willin' abandon me te darkness,†he rasped. “Is tha' it, Little Wolf?"
Roen felt a chill run down her spine at that name. It was the name his other self had used to call her. The Wolf was what the stranger wearing her brother’s face called himself. And yet he knew all the things that Gharen knew, and used his words against her like daggers that knew where to strike. A part of her always wondered how much of that rage-driven entity was actually a part of her brother’s own personality.
Before she had a chance to answer, Gharen turned away and started to limp toward the beach.
That brought the paladin to her feet, anger closing her hand into a fist. "I sent Kiht after you. I begged Delial to find you. I pleaded for Kage to aid you. But I was in no condition to do anything for you. Do you understand?" she shouted at his back. "You were not the only one fighting your own demons!"
Gharen half turned to look over his shoulder, without meeting her eyes. "No, I don' understand, an' I don' suspect I will right away. Because I'd have moved mountains fer ye if'n t'was required o' me." When he turned toward the water again, the winds were finally beginning to diminish, and the sea was no longer angrily pounding against the sand. His tone quieted with resignation. "But ye are nae me, so I cannae expect ye te do as I would. Too true I suppose, alike but malms apart."
"I cared for you, when this happened to you the first time. Have you forgotten already? All you remember is me siding with a lawless pirate. You think I despised you when it was me begging you not to get involved? So we do not stand on opposite sides?"
Roen flexed her fingers, forcibly calming her tone. “We had not spoken. You disappeared. And… so did I. Only I did so, for a reason.†She exhaled and bowed her head. “I did not know what had happened. And you do not know what I was going through. Do not judge me for my--â€
The paladin paused mid-breath when she heard another approach behind her. When Delial let out a long sigh to announce her presence, Roen pressed her lips shut. This was not why she had come.
Gharen glanced at the Highlander’s arrival, before he slowly strode further out toward the sea. “I need te think,†he muttered.
"One might be surprised how well that tunnel carries.†Delial continued her approach toward the fire. “Why, I could hear you half way up the beach!" She crossed her arms as she came to a stop a few fulms away from the paladin, her eyes flitting between the two siblings. It soon came to linger on the elder who continued to walk away.
"I should not have come." Roen sighed wearily. "This was what I feared every time I envisioned us talking." Her shoulders sank; her exasperation had faded with the storm’s retreat.
Delial's countenance flattened from annoyed to simply placid, almost resigned. She did not look surprised at all to have witnessed the bickering. "It all sounds so familiar, does it not? Circles and circles of words. I did ask him to be patient with you, but I suppose patience and open-mindedness do not go hand in hand."
Roen stared out into the night sky, where the stars were beginning to emerge. "I could have chosen better words. I... understand that he is angry. Frustrated. And hurt." She gave Delial a helpless shrug. "I told him I did not search for him."
“He is angry, just as you say, and eventually he will have to come to terms with it." Delial glanced Gharen's way again, her lips pursed. "It ought be plain you two need each other. Just in what way, I suppose, is the question."
When Roen did not answer, Delial lightened her tone. “Regardless, I am pleased you came. Your friend, is he...?" Her pale gaze searched the shadows behind the paladin, and her tone seemed to suggest that she was half expecting someone tall and dark and in a strange hat to be lost among the rocks.
Roen let out a quiet snort, her mood easing slightly. "Ah, he is attending to his dried fish." She watched a log pop within the flames and followed a single ember as it took flight into the air. "Gratitude, Delial. For all this. Despite my debacle of an attempt, I think… overall it was good for him."
Delial nodded as she lowered her hands to her hips. "That you made an attempt at all is important. I can say little on... on positive familial relations, I suppose, but I expect beneath that stubborn skin of his, Gharen understands it as well." She paused as she regarded the man in the distance. "He does not remember a thing. None of it, the year gone by. It must be extraordinarily difficult."
"I cannot tell him what happened. I was not there." Roen lowered her head with that admission. "Forgive me that I leave it to you and Kiht to share those truths with him. As for my own... I do not know if or when I will be ready."
When Roen looked to Delial, the Highlander wore a warmer expression, although it could have just been the flickering flames.
"Kiht even calls what I did... brave,†the paladin continued, shaking her head. “And I see no bravery, or anything of honor in it. Is it wrong that I cannot let it go? She seems befuddled when I refuse to speak of it."
Delial gave her an appraising look. "I speak from experience when I say... 'tis far, far easier said than done. Whether it was brave, or honorable, I do not know. But you will wear it all your life." Her words slowed with certainty. "Speak of it. Or do not. Everyone has their secrets. That ought be respected, blood or not."
Roen pondered that in silence. It was a gradual feeling, but one that lifted the corner of her lips and lightened the weight upon her chest. Of all people, it was Delial that not only understood, but also accepted her unwillingness to share that painful memory again.
“Gratitude,†Roen said quietly as she watched her brother send a small stone skipping out across the waves into the sea.
"There is something I wished to ask you... though I am not certain if you would know." It was Delial’s turn to break the silence. When Roen gave her an expectant look, the Highlander began to chew one corner of her lip. “You have been working in and around Isghard, yes? Fighting all manner of things, I expect."
“Aye. I have. What is it that you need?"
"Voidsent."
Roen blinked. She turned to the Highlander wide eyed.
"Have you encountered any?" Delial stared right back, a sudden severity settling in her eyes.
The paladin narrowed her eyes in thought. "I have not personally, but I do know that there is an underground fortress that was headed by House Dzemael. It is... said to be infested by the Voidsent. I have never been sent to fortify that area, I worked under the Knight Captain of House Durendaire. But all the knights know of the place."
"Is that so? I see. I suspect the place I seek is one unknown." Delial did not seem entirely satisfied, her shoulders drooping. "Well, I intend to return whenever Gharen is... settled. Do me a favor and keep an ear to the ground for me, would you?"
Roen nodded, when she spotted Gharen returning to the fire. He gave Delial a single nod before turning a stern visage upon the paladin. "I am sure'n ye had yer reasons, an' I may nae like, nor agree with them but above tha' yer family. An tha' takes precedence, tha' does nae change." Anger had faded from his voice.
"I am... relieved to hear you say so,†Roen sighed, a small smile touching her lips.
"Tha' ne'er changed an' was in question." Gharen looked between the two of them, before he began to shuffling off. "I'll head back te my room so tha' ye two can' catch up, or' gossip whichever t'was ye were doin'."
Roen and Delial exchanged looks with each other, both of their expression having softened.
Then from around the bend, the rocky tunnel echoed with one loud yell. “And no more pirate boyfriends!â€
The paladin pressed her lips together, staring off to where her brother had disappeared in disbelief. "Did he just...?"
"Best not to question it, I think.†Delial crossed her arms again.
Roen ran her hand over her forehead into her hair, still staring after Gharen’s footprints. She did not know whether to laugh or frown. “No more pirate boyfriends,†she echoed dumbly.
"Nothing but trouble." Delial smirked.
And for the first time, she did not feel as if all the air in her lungs was being choked out at the mention of him. "Nothing but trouble," she muttered.
After an awkward moment of silence, Roen cleared her throat and looked back to Delial with a lighter expression in place. "Well, I should go. I shall keep an ear to the ground, for certain."
Delial grinned warmly, and this time, the paladin was certain it was not the trick of the fire. "My thanks. I suppose I will be in touch when I return to the area. As pleasant as this has been... always work to be done."
"Indeed, there is work to be done." The paladin looked around again. "As soon as I find Khadai..." she muttered, then paused as she gave the Highlander a pointed look. “You will take good care of Gharen, I trust.â€
Delial’s smile broadened a little more, almost playfully so. "I will try, at least."
Roen arched her brow, unsure of what amused Delial so. Perhaps she did not want to know. Besides, Khadai had been out of her sight for far too long, perhaps he had gotten lost again. Or somehow found himself competing in some troublesome contest. The paladin was determined to discourage him from obtaining yet another bizarre trophy. She quickly spun on her heel and began to make her way toward the huts.
“Stay well!†Roen paused, waving to Delial almost distractedly.
Delial’s strange grin lingered as the woman gently waved her off.
"Figure's such a lovely place would get marred by horrendous weather."
Roen recognized Gharen’s voice without turning. She had heard his approach, limping gait shuffling over sand along with the light tapping of a cane that searched for solid footing. “No place is safe from the storm, I have learned.†She regarded him briefly. “You should sit.â€
"Mayhaps, but tis jus' wind an' rain." He shrugged, but acquieced none the less, lowering himself slowly to the ground with some difficulty. "Miss Jakkya suggested we be locked in a room. I'm inclined te agree."
Roen snorted softly. "Kiht can be impatient at times. I think a part of her fears that I will disappear again."
"Ye cannae have disappeared fer too terribly long, ye helped them find me,†Gharen reflected quietly.
Goosebumps rose along her arms and it was not from the cold. Roen stared straight ahead into the darkness and said nothing as the howling winds suddenly filled the silence between them. "Has no memory of the time that has passed returned to you?" she finally broke the quiet again, her voice raspy.
"No, th' last I remember t'was th' bridge in th' shroud.†Gharen shook his head, his untrimmed hair falling heavily in front of his eyes. “Pretty sure'n tha' I was attacked. Tis... fuzzy at best."
Roen only afforded him a sidelong glance, taking care to keep her tone and expression neutral. "Has Delial still told you nothing?"
He looked back at her curiously. "Only tha' Nero has been put te grass, an' ye've had somethin' o' a hard time o' it."
The paladin flexed her jaw and averted her gaze at the name, looking back out to the ocean. She was not yet ready to have that conversation yet.
"Though I have th' distinct feelin' they're nae tellin me everythin',†Gharen continued to muse quietly. “Which is gettin tirin' in it's own way... bein' treated as if I may break upon th' slightest provocation."
"You cannot blame them." Roen shrugged. When she turned to look at him, her voice had taken a cooler turn. "Who is to say they are wrong?"
"I recall believin' tha' ye dispised me an dinnae want anythin' te do with me because I dinnae support ye in followin' Nero." He too turned, meeting her gaze dead on. "Given th' way our previous meetin' an' this one are goin', was I right?"
Roen gave him a hard stare. A frown creased her brow despite her best efforts. "Think you so little of me?" The rain pelted the canvas of leaves above and the flames in front of them danced chaotically.
"Dinnae know what te think right now,†Gharen barked back. “Because people feel th' need te nae talk te me about it. Given I don' have any recollection regardin' th' past cycle. Tis a bit o' a gap an' alot o' ground te cover. Only learned th' past couple o' suns ago tha' Ishgard has thrown open th' gates te their city." He shook his head as he looked away. "Somethin' I imagine tis old news an' would garner looks like I was a foreigner or a loon fer nae knowin'."
Breath… the paladin told herself. Why were they rushing into this discussion already? Was this not what she had feared? And yet… she knew the truth would and should come forth eventually. Her brother was almost chomping at the bits to hear it. After one long exhale, the frown that had twisted her visage slowly faded again.
"I understand your impatience,†she murmured. “It is as if you slept a long time. And while you slept, the world continued on." She turned back to the ocean and the waves that were violently crashing against the beach. “Give it time, Gharen. Not all of us are ready or wanting to relive those moons again."
That did not quell his ire. Gharen planted his cane into the sand as he rose again hastily, his hand nearly shaking with the effort. "Don' forget th' part about while I slept, some thrice damned infernal dark side ran about causin' trouble an' gods know what else,†he snapped back.
Roen shot him a narrowed look. "Indeed. That did happen. I would tell you what you want to know, only..." She exhaled sharply through her nose. "I know not the details. Delial, Kiht, and Kage... they were the ones that were following your trail."
Gharen paused, looking at her expectantly. “"An ye were lookin' inte other leads or th' like?"
The paladin’s gaze did not waver, although her entire form stiffened. Her fingers curled slightly upon the sand. "Nay." She shook her head slowly. "I only bid them to find you."
Gharen furrowed his brow, confusion clear in his eyes. "While ye were doin' what?"
Roen set her jaw, steeling herself. "As I tried to forget that the rest of the world existed."
A long pause fell between the siblings again. Her brother seemed frozen in time for a moment as he made no sound or movement. Then he swallowed as her words seemed to sink in, and looked away from her.
"So what yer meanin' te say... is ye were willin' abandon me te darkness,†he rasped. “Is tha' it, Little Wolf?"
Roen felt a chill run down her spine at that name. It was the name his other self had used to call her. The Wolf was what the stranger wearing her brother’s face called himself. And yet he knew all the things that Gharen knew, and used his words against her like daggers that knew where to strike. A part of her always wondered how much of that rage-driven entity was actually a part of her brother’s own personality.
Before she had a chance to answer, Gharen turned away and started to limp toward the beach.
That brought the paladin to her feet, anger closing her hand into a fist. "I sent Kiht after you. I begged Delial to find you. I pleaded for Kage to aid you. But I was in no condition to do anything for you. Do you understand?" she shouted at his back. "You were not the only one fighting your own demons!"
Gharen half turned to look over his shoulder, without meeting her eyes. "No, I don' understand, an' I don' suspect I will right away. Because I'd have moved mountains fer ye if'n t'was required o' me." When he turned toward the water again, the winds were finally beginning to diminish, and the sea was no longer angrily pounding against the sand. His tone quieted with resignation. "But ye are nae me, so I cannae expect ye te do as I would. Too true I suppose, alike but malms apart."
"I cared for you, when this happened to you the first time. Have you forgotten already? All you remember is me siding with a lawless pirate. You think I despised you when it was me begging you not to get involved? So we do not stand on opposite sides?"
Roen flexed her fingers, forcibly calming her tone. “We had not spoken. You disappeared. And… so did I. Only I did so, for a reason.†She exhaled and bowed her head. “I did not know what had happened. And you do not know what I was going through. Do not judge me for my--â€
The paladin paused mid-breath when she heard another approach behind her. When Delial let out a long sigh to announce her presence, Roen pressed her lips shut. This was not why she had come.
Gharen glanced at the Highlander’s arrival, before he slowly strode further out toward the sea. “I need te think,†he muttered.
"One might be surprised how well that tunnel carries.†Delial continued her approach toward the fire. “Why, I could hear you half way up the beach!" She crossed her arms as she came to a stop a few fulms away from the paladin, her eyes flitting between the two siblings. It soon came to linger on the elder who continued to walk away.
"I should not have come." Roen sighed wearily. "This was what I feared every time I envisioned us talking." Her shoulders sank; her exasperation had faded with the storm’s retreat.
Delial's countenance flattened from annoyed to simply placid, almost resigned. She did not look surprised at all to have witnessed the bickering. "It all sounds so familiar, does it not? Circles and circles of words. I did ask him to be patient with you, but I suppose patience and open-mindedness do not go hand in hand."
Roen stared out into the night sky, where the stars were beginning to emerge. "I could have chosen better words. I... understand that he is angry. Frustrated. And hurt." She gave Delial a helpless shrug. "I told him I did not search for him."
“He is angry, just as you say, and eventually he will have to come to terms with it." Delial glanced Gharen's way again, her lips pursed. "It ought be plain you two need each other. Just in what way, I suppose, is the question."
When Roen did not answer, Delial lightened her tone. “Regardless, I am pleased you came. Your friend, is he...?" Her pale gaze searched the shadows behind the paladin, and her tone seemed to suggest that she was half expecting someone tall and dark and in a strange hat to be lost among the rocks.
Roen let out a quiet snort, her mood easing slightly. "Ah, he is attending to his dried fish." She watched a log pop within the flames and followed a single ember as it took flight into the air. "Gratitude, Delial. For all this. Despite my debacle of an attempt, I think… overall it was good for him."
Delial nodded as she lowered her hands to her hips. "That you made an attempt at all is important. I can say little on... on positive familial relations, I suppose, but I expect beneath that stubborn skin of his, Gharen understands it as well." She paused as she regarded the man in the distance. "He does not remember a thing. None of it, the year gone by. It must be extraordinarily difficult."
"I cannot tell him what happened. I was not there." Roen lowered her head with that admission. "Forgive me that I leave it to you and Kiht to share those truths with him. As for my own... I do not know if or when I will be ready."
When Roen looked to Delial, the Highlander wore a warmer expression, although it could have just been the flickering flames.
"Kiht even calls what I did... brave,†the paladin continued, shaking her head. “And I see no bravery, or anything of honor in it. Is it wrong that I cannot let it go? She seems befuddled when I refuse to speak of it."
Delial gave her an appraising look. "I speak from experience when I say... 'tis far, far easier said than done. Whether it was brave, or honorable, I do not know. But you will wear it all your life." Her words slowed with certainty. "Speak of it. Or do not. Everyone has their secrets. That ought be respected, blood or not."
Roen pondered that in silence. It was a gradual feeling, but one that lifted the corner of her lips and lightened the weight upon her chest. Of all people, it was Delial that not only understood, but also accepted her unwillingness to share that painful memory again.
“Gratitude,†Roen said quietly as she watched her brother send a small stone skipping out across the waves into the sea.
"There is something I wished to ask you... though I am not certain if you would know." It was Delial’s turn to break the silence. When Roen gave her an expectant look, the Highlander began to chew one corner of her lip. “You have been working in and around Isghard, yes? Fighting all manner of things, I expect."
“Aye. I have. What is it that you need?"
"Voidsent."
Roen blinked. She turned to the Highlander wide eyed.
"Have you encountered any?" Delial stared right back, a sudden severity settling in her eyes.
The paladin narrowed her eyes in thought. "I have not personally, but I do know that there is an underground fortress that was headed by House Dzemael. It is... said to be infested by the Voidsent. I have never been sent to fortify that area, I worked under the Knight Captain of House Durendaire. But all the knights know of the place."
"Is that so? I see. I suspect the place I seek is one unknown." Delial did not seem entirely satisfied, her shoulders drooping. "Well, I intend to return whenever Gharen is... settled. Do me a favor and keep an ear to the ground for me, would you?"
Roen nodded, when she spotted Gharen returning to the fire. He gave Delial a single nod before turning a stern visage upon the paladin. "I am sure'n ye had yer reasons, an' I may nae like, nor agree with them but above tha' yer family. An tha' takes precedence, tha' does nae change." Anger had faded from his voice.
"I am... relieved to hear you say so,†Roen sighed, a small smile touching her lips.
"Tha' ne'er changed an' was in question." Gharen looked between the two of them, before he began to shuffling off. "I'll head back te my room so tha' ye two can' catch up, or' gossip whichever t'was ye were doin'."
Roen and Delial exchanged looks with each other, both of their expression having softened.
Then from around the bend, the rocky tunnel echoed with one loud yell. “And no more pirate boyfriends!â€
The paladin pressed her lips together, staring off to where her brother had disappeared in disbelief. "Did he just...?"
"Best not to question it, I think.†Delial crossed her arms again.
Roen ran her hand over her forehead into her hair, still staring after Gharen’s footprints. She did not know whether to laugh or frown. “No more pirate boyfriends,†she echoed dumbly.
"Nothing but trouble." Delial smirked.
And for the first time, she did not feel as if all the air in her lungs was being choked out at the mention of him. "Nothing but trouble," she muttered.
After an awkward moment of silence, Roen cleared her throat and looked back to Delial with a lighter expression in place. "Well, I should go. I shall keep an ear to the ground, for certain."
Delial grinned warmly, and this time, the paladin was certain it was not the trick of the fire. "My thanks. I suppose I will be in touch when I return to the area. As pleasant as this has been... always work to be done."
"Indeed, there is work to be done." The paladin looked around again. "As soon as I find Khadai..." she muttered, then paused as she gave the Highlander a pointed look. “You will take good care of Gharen, I trust.â€
Delial’s smile broadened a little more, almost playfully so. "I will try, at least."
Roen arched her brow, unsure of what amused Delial so. Perhaps she did not want to know. Besides, Khadai had been out of her sight for far too long, perhaps he had gotten lost again. Or somehow found himself competing in some troublesome contest. The paladin was determined to discourage him from obtaining yet another bizarre trophy. She quickly spun on her heel and began to make her way toward the huts.
“Stay well!†Roen paused, waving to Delial almost distractedly.
Delial’s strange grin lingered as the woman gently waved her off.