(06-15-2016, 02:43 PM)Lamiaris Wrote: I'm very ill in real life and often I have to poof without warning to take care of my health; sometimes I'm able to come back to FFXIV, sometimes I can't..
I'm always scared that someone's going to flip out/ cuss/ scream at me due to such things; and also due to having to poof, I'm often too terribly frightened of being screamed at,  that I stay off for the rest of the day TnT

(06-15-2016, 02:43 PM)Lamiaris Wrote: I'm very ill in real life and often I have to poof without warning to take care of my health; sometimes I'm able to come back to FFXIV, sometimes I can't..
I'm always scared that someone's going to flip out/ cuss/ scream at me due to such things; and also due to having to poof, I'm often too terribly frightened of being screamed at,  that I stay off for the rest of the day TnT

(06-15-2016, 03:09 PM)Kibu Wrote: Something you might try is to send an ooc /tell or another method of contact to the person/people you're RPing with and tell them that you might vanish at any given time. 

(06-16-2016, 10:34 AM)Lamiaris Wrote:

(06-15-2016, 03:09 PM)Kibu Wrote: Something you might try is to send an ooc /tell or another method of contact to the person/people you're RPing with and tell them that you might vanish at any given time. 

Trust me, I've tried this. Some people still get very angry at me and get pissed off..
Most people are fine about it, but there are still a few people that act like complete derps about it..

(06-16-2016, 01:10 PM)Selarian Cloverbloom Wrote: I am really insecure about reaching out to RP with new people. Even when they have told me that it is ok, or (like Kibu above here) have told me actively in PMs to seek them out, I freeze up. I sometimes wish that I had the courage to go into some of the major RP hubs and start RPing in there, but I have the feeling that I never will.

(06-16-2016, 02:36 PM)Kibu Wrote:

(06-16-2016, 01:10 PM)Selarian Cloverbloom Wrote: I am really insecure about reaching out to RP with new people. Even when they have told me that it is ok, or (like Kibu above here) have told me actively in PMs to seek them out, I freeze up. I sometimes wish that I had the courage to go into some of the major RP hubs and start RPing in there, but I have the feeling that I never will.

What happens when two shy people offer up their contact info to each other?

...absolutely nothing! Neither one has the nerves to approach the other! 

I feel you on this one, Selarian. And I don't take it as an offense when people don't contact me in-game. I figure it's either a matter where we aren't online at the same time, or that the other person is fighting just as much anxiety as I am. The one time I sent a message to someone else in-game, even after they gave me express permission on here, I nearly had a full-blown panic attack. I'm prone to looking people up in the player search, then sitting there for a good half hour or so trying to make myself send a /tell but just can't do it.

The intent is there. The follow-through is... difficult...

(06-16-2016, 01:10 PM)Selarian Cloverbloom Wrote: I am really insecure about reaching out to RP with new people. Even when they have told me that it is ok, or (like Kibu above here) have told me actively in PMs to seek them out, I freeze up. I sometimes wish that I had the courage to go into some of the major RP hubs and start RPing in there, but I have the feeling that I never will.

(06-16-2016, 03:13 PM)Yune Wrote:

(06-16-2016, 01:10 PM)Selarian Cloverbloom Wrote: I am really insecure about reaching out to RP with new people. Even when they have told me that it is ok, or (like Kibu above here) have told me actively in PMs to seek them out, I freeze up. I sometimes wish that I had the courage to go into some of the major RP hubs and start RPing in there, but I have the feeling that I never will.

I've felt this anxiety on many occasions as well. I wouldn't say I'm necessarily shy, but I'm a rather quiet and reserved individual who hasn't had much experience with reaching out to others or being the instigator of new friendships. This is part of the reason my FFXIV experience thus far has been about 80-90% solo play and no RP.

It's been coupled with my current insecurity about rejoining the community after my long break as I don't really know anyone and have no close friends who may help. I'm an unknown with no reputation (that I know of) so my hesitation in putting myself out there often spawns from that nagging thought of "why would anyone be interested in someone like me with no track record?" But as I don't know effective ways to really get out there in the mix, I have that fear that I'll just be stuck in limbo forever.

It also doesn't help my confidence when I do manage to meet people who actively seek me out at first, yet inevitably show me that they have no interest in me or my characters and would rather talk about themself and their own ideas all day while promptly changing the subject when I try to mention anything from my own side. I can understand being proud of one's creation or ideas, but from the perspective of the one who gets silenced repeatedly because of this pride, it flares up the crippling thought that perhaps I have simply nothing to offer anyone. I know that such things are entirely dependent on the types of people I come across, as not everyone is so self-centered, but my luck thus far hasn't helped me at all.

(06-15-2016, 02:43 PM)Lamiaris Wrote: I'm very ill in real life and often I have to poof without warning to take care of my health; sometimes I'm able to come back to FFXIV, sometimes I can't..
I'm always scared that someone's going to flip out/ cuss/ scream at me due to such things; and also due to having to poof, I'm often too terribly frightened of being screamed at,  that I stay off for the rest of the day TnT